Part 2: Relationship Alliance, Relation-ship

Relationship Alliance

⏱ 30–60 minutes · Individual + Couple

The Design Relationship Alliance (DRA) draws on the ORSC™ Design Team Alliance tool. It acts as a foundational agreement, a living document that helps you navigate your relationship with clarity and care. It can be refreshed and updated whenever life calls for it.

It is composed of two parts: A. Creating and clarifying the culture or atmosphere you want together, and B. Understanding shared responsibility in maintaining that culture.

Before you start: Read all the steps together first. You can each brainstorm individually then come together, or work through it as a pair from the start completing digitally or with pen and paper. Choose what feels right for you.

Steps

Structure your alliance

The three columns below represent the three core questions. Read them together and make sure you both understand what each one is asking before you begin.

Brainstorm individually

For each question, take a few minutes alone to add notes. Whatever words, phrases or ideas come to mind. There are no wrong answers.

Your Relationship Alliance board

Tap + Add to place your ideas into each column. Use the colour tabs to indicate who added each note if you wish. Continue on pen and paper if you choose to do so. You can use different colour pens if you wish.

Note colour:

What atmosphere or culture do we want to have together?

Part A: our shared culture

e.g. warmth, honesty, adventure, safety…

How do we want to be together when things are difficult?

Part A: navigating difficulty

e.g. pause before reacting, stay curious, ask not assume…

What else would help our relationship to thrive?

Part B: shared responsibility

e.g. weekly check-ins, shared rituals, saying thank you…

Discuss and refine together

Go through each column together. Some notes may need clarifying, ask each other questions.

What does this mean to you specifically?
Does this need clarification about time or place?
How will each of us hold ourselves accountable to this?
Is there anything that needs rephrasing to feel truly shared?

Filter and finalise

Remove notes that don't feel essential (tap the × on any note). What remains is your Relationship Alliance. You can always come back and update it.

Reflections on this exercise